Professor Dante, Defence Against The Dark Arts Teacher
by Insieme per la vittoria
Summary: Desperate to avoid Dolores Umbridge becoming teacher of Defence against the Dark Arts, Dumbledore hires a demonic mercenary to do the job instead. He is rude, uncultured, rough, and about as British as New York City, but he is excellent at fighting evil. Dante Sparda is his name.
1. Dumbledore's Job Offer

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Dante sat in his office, his feet up on the table, as he regarded the old man before him.  
"So I'm supposed to believe that you're a wizard who teaches at a magician's school with a name that sounds like a skin condition?"  
Dumbledore smiled. "Perhaps. It will be well worth your while to believe it, skin condition comment notwithstanding."  
"Why me, old man? I can use magic, but I'm not a wand waver. I use a sword and a pair of guns." 

Dumbledore summoned a glass of wine form nowhere and started to drink.  
"We need someone to take over the post of Defence against the Dark Arts teacher. The Ministry plans to put someone absolutely atrocious into the job, and furthermore, I doubt there is anyone on the face of the Earth who knows more about fighting evil than you. Lord Voldemort is a threat to the entire world, but then so was Mundus, now wasn't he?" 

Still not convinced, Dante prepared to have another slice of his pizza. Just as he was about to eat it, Dumbledore made it vanish, earning him a glare from Dante, who had just closed his mouth around thin air.  
"Do you want to die, grandpa?"  
Dumbledore made the pizza reappear on the plate.  
"I know you are in debt still, Dante. We can pay all of it off in one go, simply in exchange for you playing Defence against the Dark Arts professor for one year. We need you, Dante. No one can teach how to combat evil better than the one who defeated the devil himself. What is your answer?"

Dante rolled his eyes, having the last pizza slice, glaring at Dumbledore in a silent threat of a bullet to the head if Dumbledore made the pizza vanish again.  
As Dante finished the pizza slice, he looked up. "I'll do it."


	2. New Staff

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger walked into the Great Hall, sitting together at the Gryffindor table, surrounded by the hundreds of students of Hogwarts.  
Dumbledore stood at the front of the staff table, just like always, and began his speech.  
"Welcome to another year at Hogwarts. I'd like to make some announcements. There will be changes of staffing this year. First off, I'm pleased to welcome Professor Sparda, who will be taking over the post of Defence against the Dark Arts teacher. Good luck, Professor."

The students hesitantly clapped, looking at the man they knew Dumbledore was referring to. He wore a red leather coat, had white hair, and had his feet rested across the staff table, which was earning him glares from both McGonagall and Flitwick. His mouth full of pizza, the guy said, loud enough for the entire school to hear, and in a thick American accent, "It's just Dante, you old fart."

Ignoring the chuckles and horrified looks on several students and staff, Dumbledore proceeded.  
"Secondly, I'm pleased to welcome back Professor Grubbly-Plank, who will be taking over Care of Magical Creatures while Professor Hagrid is on temporary leave. Finally, I'd like to welcome an overseer and inspector from the Ministry of Magic, High Inquisitor Dolores Umbridge, who will be sitting in on classes and seeing that they are as good as they can be."

A short woman in pink moved up to the front, placing herself in front of Dumbledore.  
"How lovely it is to see all of these bright, happy faces smiling up at me. The Ministry has always considered the education of young witches and wizards to be of vital importance. While each headmaster has brought something new to this historic school, progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged. We must preserve what must be preserved, perfect what can be perfected, and prune practices that ought to be prohibited." She finished up with a giggle.

In the silence that immediately followed her speech, one voice could be heard, speaking with sufficient volume to be heard even from the door to the Great Hall.  
"Now that's the biggest load o' shit I've ever heard." Said Professor Sparda, or Dante as he liked to be called, shamelessly, ignoring the glares he received from the other staff, with the notable exception of Dumbledore.


	3. Dante's Class

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry, Ron and Hermione stepped into the Defence against the Dark Arts classroom, wondering what this rough professor's lessons would be like. Professor Sparda sat on the desk, twirling a large white pistol. Harry also noticed the massive black sword that was leaning against the wall.

Professor Sparda looked at Harry casually. Harry stopped in his tracks, wary of the fact that the professor had stopped twirling his gun, and was holding it as if ready to shoot it, and also wary of the fact that Ron, Hermione and everyone else had already sat down, and were avoiding looking at the strange professor.  
"Hey there. What's your name, kid?"  
"I'm Harry Potter, sir."  
"And why are you looking like you've seen a ghost, Harry Potter sir?" 

Hermione watched this exchange closely, readying her wand under the table in case the man proved dangerous. Hermione watched as the professor vanished, and then he was beside her, looking down at the wand she was holding. "Planning to curse me, are you?"  
Hermione nervously met the professor's gaze. "I was…"  
"Go ahead. Give it your best shot."  
Hermione narrowed her eyes, confused. "Sir, are you asking me to attack you?"  
Professor Sparda shrugged. "You got my permission, and don't call me sir. It's just Dante."

Hermione put her wand away, not wanting to attack the professor, who she now got the impression was harmless. Dante shrugged. "Alright. Onto the actual lesson. First things first, I want everyone to take out their copies of Dark Arts: Basics for Beginners, the books provided by Umbridge."  
The students produced their books, placing them on the desks. Dante picked up all the books, placing them in a large, single pile on the floor, so there were thirty books stacked directly on top of each other.

Dante stepped over to the pile, looking it up and down.  
"I thought what that old bag said at the table was the biggest load of shit I'd ever heard, but that was before I read these books. There's nothing useful in them at all."  
Dante held out his hand, and the large sword flew into his waiting palm. Before any student could say anything, Dante had slashed straight down the pile, reducing Umbridge's useless books to a pile of scattered paper.

Dante then placed the sword across his back, and turned to face the class.  
"That's mission one complete. Next, everyone take out their wands."  
As Dante began to proceed, he noticed that Hermione still held her book, as she had strong feelings about damaging any book, even a useless one. Dante held out his hand.  
"Come on, kid. Give me that book so I can throw a few hundred pages worth of horseshit out the window."

Hermione gave Dante her book, and he proceeded to throw it out the open window above him with amazing strength. The students watched in disbelief as the book went beyond the mountains, and still wasn't losing altitude. When they lost sight of it, it was not because of it falling, as one might expect, but because it went beyond the clouds, where it was obscured completely by them. Miles above the clouds, Dumbledore's phoenix, Fawkes, dived to the side to avoid the incoming book, and then looked up with his enhanced vision to see the book explode as it hit the atmosphere.

Dante turned to face the class. "Right. Now we can move on."  
Dante moved back to his original position. "Who here believes Harry's story about Voldemort?"  
The students gasped as they heard the name, and Seamus stood up, glaring at Dante.  
"First the rubbish he comes out with, and now you're using the name?"  
Dante looked at Seamus, expressionless. "You people avoid the name 'cause you're scared, and I'm less scared of him than I am of Lady."

As the class stared in disbelief at Dante's outright insulting attitude towards the deadliest dark wizard of all time, Seamus sat back down, looking downcast.

Dante turned to face the rest of the class again. "Well, I believe Harry's story. I think all of you need to get accustomed to fighting evil. Since I'm your teacher, you're not really in a position to refuse."  
Allowing people a second to absorb this, Dante decided. "Now, the first thing I'm gonna get you to do is attack me. Each of you will attack me with some of their deadliest spells and see if I have any trouble at all overpowering them. First up is Harry Potter."

Harry hesitantly stood, his wand out. Dante pointed his gun at Harry. "Let's get this party started."  
Harry fired a stunning curse at Dante, and watched as Dante vanished, avoiding the spell with ease. Harry looked around the classroom for the missing professor, before suddenly feeling a gun pressed into the back of his head. "Not too bad, kid, but you need to do better."  
After Harry, each of the students stepped up in turn, attacking Dante in their own way. No one came close to hitting him, and all found themselves staring down either the barrel of his gun or the blade of his sword after only firing one or two spells. Dante was simply too fast for all of them.

After everyone had had their turn, Dante stood in front of the class. "Ok. Now it seems as if all you need is to learn to hit more elusive targets, but I'll give you an extra lesson. One of you come up and hit me with a few curses. I'll show you durable some of your opponents might be."

Harry hesitantly stepped up, followed by Hermione. Harry fired a stunning curse into Dante's chest, and watched as the red clad professor showed no sign that it bothered him, not even moved by its impact. Hermione stepped up beside him, firing a full body bind curse at Dante, watching in disbelief as it hit him, but had no effect, Dante still casually twirling his gun. Hermione then fired a jelly legs charm into Dante, and again watched as it had no effect whatsoever.

Still casually twirling his gun, Dante turned to face the class. "We got work to do, kids. I'll have a new project for you next lesson, with a different target. Catch ya later."  
The students left, all of them silently trying to figure out who and what was teaching them.

Outside, Harry spoke to Ron and Hermione. "Even that dragon I fought last year wasn't as resistant to magic as him. He showed no effects at all."  
Hermione opened her mouth to talk, but then closed it. Harry had picked up on it, however, and told her to speak. "Well, it's just that I think he may be a demon. Demons have incredible resistance to magic, and some of the strongest ones are almost indestructible, just like him." 

Ron smirked, obviously thinking Hermione was overreacting.  
"You honestly think Dumbledore's hired an evil creature from Hell to teach the class?"  
Hermione shook her head. "Dante is a lot of things, but he's not evil. It's just… Well how else do you explain how strong he is? Or the fact that spells like Petrificus Totalis had absolutely no effect on him? He certainly isn't human."


	4. Dealing With Umbridge

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Dolores Umbridge glared at Dumbledore across his desk.  
"How dare you place this American blunderer into a teaching position? You had no right to go ahead and put someone unqualified into the job in the first place, but the Ministry could easily construe that you have no regard for the safety of your students or this school." 

Dumbledore took a sip of his drink. "Dante is perfectly capable, I assure you. He is no blunderer. He will teach the students a great deal."  
Umbridge struggled to maintain control, obviously wanting to scream at the headmaster who had so easily outwitted both her and the Minister. "I've heard reports that he is ordering students to attack him, and that he destroyed the books the Ministry provided. How do you explain that?"

Dumbledore smiled, having already heard about Dante's teaching method.  
"I admit the books may have been more useful as firewood, but Dante's reaction is most understandable. As for him ordering them to attack him, well, he's trying to ascertain their skills with defensive spells. A most important thing for Defence against the Dark Arts, wouldn't you agree?"

Umbridge leaned across the desk. "I want to talk to him about his most inappropriate style of teaching. He is on his way, I presume?"  
Dumbledore nodded. "Oh, yes. Professor Dante will be here momentarily."

Just as Dumbledore said this, the door opened to admit Dante. "Hey there, old timer. What's up?"  
Umbridge moved over to Dante, trying to look intimidating. "Professor Sparda, I've received reports that you destroyed the books provided by the Ministry, and that you told the students a nonsense story about You-Know-Who, as well as ordering the students to attack you. How do you explain this unbecoming behaviour?"

Dante smirked, sitting on Dumbledore's desk. "I took one look at those books and couldn't resist. I heard the one I threw out the window was partially found in London, of all places."  
Umbridge curled her upper lip. "And how do you explain ordering the students to attack you, and the story about You-Know-Who?"

Dante turned to Dumbledore. "You called me up here to talk to her? Out of all the blind dates people have tried to set me on, this is the worst. That's saying a lot, seeing as how the others were demons trying to kill me."

Umbridge stamped her foot like a child, glaring at Dante. "Pay close attention to me! And… Did you just say demons?"  
Dante shrugged. "Maybe."  
Umbridge stepped up close to Dante in an attempt to intimidate him. A useless attempt, as she didn't even come up to his shoulder. Realizing this, she then gripped him by the collar and attempted to pull him forward, but he didn't budge. Umbridge then drew her wand and pointed it into his face, trying to intimidate him with the threat of being cursed. An equally useless attempt, as he already knew curses had no effect on him.

After glaring at Dante's smirking face for a few seconds, Umbridge backed off, realizing she was completely outmatched. Some instinct told her that to attack Dante would be a very bad idea.  
Finally, a deflated Umbridge put her wand away, and stomped out of the headmaster's office.  
"You haven't heard the end of this." She said angrily as she left.

After she was gone, Dante turned to face Dumbledore. "She's a real prize, isn't she?"  
Dumbledore smiled, finishing his drink. "She wanted to have the job I've given you, but I gave it to you before she could take it. I need you to teach the students how to defend themselves against all kinds of enemies. Do you have a plan after having them attack you?"  
Dante nodded. "Yeah. I've caught the supplies for the next few lessons already."

As Dante started to leave, Dumbledore said one more thing. "Just out of curiosity, did you really slash all of Umbridge's books in half?"  
Dante shook his head. "Not all. Some Hermione chick wouldn't put hers on the pile, so I threw it out the window instead."  
Dumbledore smirked. "I knew about that one. Fawkes only just dodged it, and I heard they're still finding bits of it as far away as Northern Ireland. That's some throw you have."  
Dante chuckled. "Oh, that was nothing. I'll throw seriously next time."


	5. Bumping Into Dante

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry walked through the grounds. He had found himself seeking solitude lately, and he was also starting to feel like he just didn't belong with his friends anymore. They just couldn't understand anything that he had been through. They hadn't lost their parents, and they hadn't seen Cedric die, and they weren't being vilified by the Ministry for suffering.

Ahead, he saw a white haired figure wearing the distinctive red coat that Dante wore. He thought about avoiding Dante, but then Dante turned and saw him. Harry moved over to Dante.  
"Hey, kid. What's up?"  
Harry shrugged. "Just out for a walk."

Dante suddenly pulled his gun and fired a shot past Harry, shooting a Blast Ended Skrewt that had just appeared from the forest. Harry watched in amazement as the Skrewt exploded.  
Dante put the gun away. "That thing's been causing some shit, so I decided to kill it. Don't tell the big guy."  
Harry chuckled. He knew Hagrid would be upset if he knew Dante had disintegrated a Blast Ended Skrewt. "Excuse me, sir, but how does a gun make a huge monster explode?"  
Dante turned to face Harry again, having been looking at the destroyed Skrewt.  
"Magic. And I thought I told you I'm just Dante. Last person who called me sir was a hooker at Enzo's brothel."

Harry looked away, having not been expecting such a rude response. Suddenly, Harry thought about something. "S… Dante, do you believe me about Voldemort, like you said?"  
Dante smirked. "Dumbledore tells me Voldemort's ass is back from the dead, so why not believe him? His opinion's quite credible as long as he remembers his own name and isn't gettin' sponge baths from Professor McGonagall."

Harry widened his eyes in horror, unable to believe the razor sharp nerve of this American.  
"When you said you weren't scared of him, why is that?"  
Dante moved towards the forest. "He's just another douchebag who wants to be a pain in everyone's ass. People being scared of him, and you avoiding your friends 'cause you're so worried about what he's gonna do, that's all more than a loser like him is worth."

Harry started to follow Dante, but Dante stopped, turning to face Harry, wearing a serious face for the first time.  
"I get that this asshole hurt you. He killed your parents. My mother died protecting me when I was young. A demon tried to make her tell him where he could find me, and she refused. She was barely recognisable when I came back and found her on the floor. The demons who did the actual killing are gone, but the bastard behind it's still alive, and will probably still be around long after I'm gone."

Harry moved over to Dante and nodded in understanding. "How old were you?"  
Dante shrugged. "I was eight. I was already a match for most demons, but not those ones, and not that many at once."  
Harry was beginning to suspect that Hermione was right about Dante, but he also recognised an ally when he saw one. For all Dante's roughness, he was in fact kind and understanding underneath it.


	6. How To Combat Demons

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry, Ron, Hermione and the rest of the class filed into the Defence against the Dark Arts classroom, where Dante stood waiting for them, a large cage with a thick cloth over it standing next to him. They noticed also that the desks had been moved against the wall, and it was rather obvious that this would be a practical lesson.  
"Hey, kids. Get your wands ready."  
As the students took their wands out, Dante ripped the cloth off the cage, revealing it to contain a large puppet. As the students laughed, Dante opened the cage, and the puppet fell out onto the floor, earning more laughter from the students. Suddenly, the puppet flung a semicircular blade at the students, which aimed straight at Parvati Patil's face.

Just as the blade was about to hit Parvati, Dante appeared in front of her, catching the blade with his hand. The puppet stood, spinning its hands, which contained two more blades. Dante stood beside it in an instant, gripping its hands and easily holding it in place.  
"This, kids, is a Marionette. It's a very basic demon soul that possesses a big puppet. It's pretty weak, but it only takes one blade to kill you. This thing is weak to all forms of magic, because it's really just a moving puppet. You guys are gonna kill this thing as soon as I let it go."

The students all readied their wands, and Dante released the Marionette. As soon as it was free, the Marionette threw a blade at Harry, who was now at the front, as everyone else had taken a step back. Reacting fast, Harry blocked the blade with a shield charm, causing the blade to bounce away harmlessly. Hermione then fired an Incendio flame inducing charm into the Marionette, instantly burning it down.

The students began congratulating Hermione, when suddenly the burned Marionette raised its mostly destroyed arm, ready to throw a blade at her. Before it could fling the blade, Dante's foot slammed down on its arm, crushing it, before his other foot slammed down on its head, finishing it off. Dante looked up at the stunned students.  
"You gotta make sure they're dead. That's basic."

Dante and the students then moved the desks and chairs back to the middle of the classroom, where the students sat down, and Dante handed out a book to each student. Hermione recognised the books as having come from the library, probably the restricted section. The books were titled "Demon Anatomy".

After several classes with Dante, the students were starting to see the variety of the demons that existed. The Marionettes were in fact the most basic form of demon there was, and others existed with strength far greater. Dante stood in the front of the classroom, the remains of a reptilian demon lying at his feet. "So, kids. What can each of you tell me about that demon?"  
Hermione's hand shot up. "That's a lightning rod foot soldier, or simply entitled a Blitz. They are warriors created by the demon king as enforcers and the demon equivalent of heavy cavalry."

Dante nodded. "And what did you notice about how I killed it?"  
This time, Harry answered. "You used your fists, imbued with some form of red magic. Then you slashed it through with your sword."  
Dante shrugged. "And how would you go about killing it?"  
Hermione's hand shot up. "You need to drop their electrical shield in order to kill them. It's heavily recommended that you use stunning curses to weaken it. However, your sword seemed to slash through both it and its shield with no problem once you imbued the blade with magic."

The students later stood in the grounds, aware of the malevolent glare of Umbridge, who was watching them from the top of the castle. Dante dragged three massive cages out into the open. One contained a spider demon even larger than Aragog, which seemed to be made of stone. Another contained a large goat demon, and the last contained a large eagle-like demon.

As Dante released these demons, the students began attacking them with various magic spells, having already studied how to fight them. The eagle-like demon was vulnerable to any attack, so stunning curses were sufficient, the goat demon was strong, but only took a series of stunning curses and a Reducto to defeat.

The stone spider was stronger than the other two, and was far too durable for the class to even damage. Just as the deceptively fast stone spider stood over the students, about to attack them, Dante's sword slammed into its head, killing it instantly.  
"Not bad, kids. I think we need to work on learning more effective spells for dealing with stronger foes."


	7. Hermione's Information

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry sat in the Gryffindor common room with just Ron and Hermione, everyone else having gone to bed. Hermione held out the book she had received from Dante.  
"Ironically, my research was started by the information I found in this. Have either of you heard the Legend of Sparda?"  
Both boys' eyes lit up at the sound of Dante's last name, though neither had heard of any legend. Hermione nodded, holding her book open at the section on the demon king, Mundus. She then read out the text.

"Demon king Mundus is an all-powerful demonic entity that once ruled the human world, which was at that time connected to the Demon World by a network of portals which Mundus himself created. Such was the power of Mundus and his demons that wizards and muggles alike were powerless against him. He ruled the world completely. However, at that time, humanity's hope was reborn in the form of a devil knight named Sparda. The best swordsman in the demon realm, and with a spirit unlike any other, Sparda forced the demons back to the Demon World, and destroyed the portals, even defeating Mundus, a feat thought impossible."

After Hermione had finished reading, Harry nodded. "Are you trying to tell us that Dante is the one mentioned in this book?"  
Hermione shook her head. "No. With this in mind, I sneaked into the restricted section two nights ago, and got this."  
She held up a book titled "The Legend of Sparda", which she flipped open to the section titled, "The Sons of Sparda".

"Sparda ruled the world peacefully, until his death. However, towards the last years of his life, Sparda married a human woman who bore twin sons. The eldest twin, Vergil, is known to have been destroyed on Mallet Island, where Mundus attempted to re-enter the human world. However, the younger twin, Dante, travelled to Mallet Island and defeated Mundus."

Hermione looked up briefly, making sure the boys had both kept up, before continuing.  
"The sole remaining son of the legendary Dark Knight Sparda, the Devil Hunter Dante has now become a legend in his own right, wielding such power that many believe he has surpassed his father. With this power, Dante stands alone between humanity and the demons, protecting the world just as his father did. Many demons, great and small, have fallen to Dante's incredible power during his long career."

Hermione finished reading, and put the book down.  
Harry was dumbstruck. "So Dante's not only a demon, but also the protector of the world? He doesn't seem the type."  
Hermione put the book away. "If what this says is true, and Dante is indeed the son of Sparda, we have only begun to see what he is capable of."  
Harry stood. "Dante's on our side, and he's spoken to me more than once. I think I should just ask him about it."

Ron widened his eyes. "Are you mad? He could slice you in half!"  
Harry and Hermione both shook their heads. "He won't, Ron." Said Harry. "He's rough, but he's not evil. He's on our side."


	8. Umbridge's Inspection

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry and the others sat in McGonagall's class, with Umbridge sitting at the back holding a clipboard, asking McGonagall to answer a question for her every now and again. As Harry and the others left, they headed to History of Magic. Umbridge had sat in on Snape's class a few days earlier, and Harry had been certain Snape had been tempted to curse Umbridge, as his fingers had kept creeping up his sleeve, where Harry knew his wand was kept.

A few days later, Harry and the class were heading into Dante's class, with Umbridge walking in behind them, trying to look important. As soon as the last student was through the door, Dante closed it, locking Umbridge out, and then casually leaned against it, his metahuman strength making her entering the classroom an impossible dream.

Finally, he opened the door, and Umbridge came stumbling in, tripping over her own feet and falling on her face. Dante closed the door and walked to the desk in the front of the room.  
"Kids, this is our comedian, the pink toad. She's here to entertain us today."  
Umbridge staggered to her feet, glaring at Dante.  
"This will work against you, Sparda."

Dante taught a very standard lesson regarding how to fight against enemies that are immune to most magic. He taught that almost all demons are vulnerable to at least one element, even if it is only slightly. Umbridge suddenly stood up.  
"So silly of me, Professor Sparda, but it seems as though you are teaching fifteen year old children about demons. These children are far too young to be exposed to the threat of an unstoppable demon. Why bother teaching them about demons when they can't fight them anyway? Everyone knows demons are unaffected by magic." 

Dante laughed. "Inspecting a class about demons, and all you know is bedtime story stuff. Demons are resistant to damage by both physical and magical means, this is true, but immunity and resistance are two entirely different things. If they know how to beat a demon, they can better defend themselves against Old Tom Voldy. He's just a wizard like the rest of you in the end, after all."

Several days had passed since Umbridge had finished her inspections. She had tried to find fault in Professor Flitwick by trying to impose a minimum height rule, attempted to sack Binns on the basis that teachers had to be alive, and attempted to prove that Dante was a nonhuman by sneaking around in his office, only to be caught and tossed out the door. Harry had left class to discover the school was buzzing with activity, and everyone was heading somewhere, looking concerned. Harry spotted Cho Chang, and asked her, "Cho, what's going on?"  
Cho met his eyes seriously. "It's Professor Trelawney."

In the courtyard, Umbridge stood over a sobbing Professor Trelawney. She held out an order of dismissal signed by Minister of Magic Cornelius Fudge himself. Everyone knew Professor Trelawney was a terrible teacher, and it was that very fact which had made her an easy victim for Umbridge to dismiss.  
"Six… Sixteen years I… I've lived and taught here…. Hogwarts is my home. Y… You can't do this."  
Umbridge smirked and held up the order, obviously feeling as if she was in charge for the first time. "Actually, my dear, I can."

Umbridge suddenly became aware of Dante standing behind her. He had appeared so suddenly it made her jump. Struggling to keep her voice from shaking in order to maintain some semblance of authority, she said, "You have something to say, my dear?"  
Dante smirked. Umbridge couldn't intimidate him. If it came to it, he doubted the entire Ministry of Magic was a threat to him. "You really got a problem with people. What is it? No guy wanted to date you your entire life? You never found another toad who'd have you either?"

Umbridge curled her lip, struggling to resist yelling at him, an action she knew would be unwise.  
"As the High Inquisitor, it is my right to dismiss teachers who don't fit standards. You, Professor Sparda, are my next target. Your teaching methods are dangerous and unapproved."

Moving faster than the eye could see, Dante pulled the wand from Umbridge's pocket and replaced it with a trick one he had received from Fred Weasley. The movement was so fast Umbridge neither saw nor felt what he did, and was therefore completely oblivious to the fact that the wand she was now carrying was designed to explode if someone tried to use it.  
Smirking, Dante turned and left, calling over his shoulder, "You can take her job, but you can't force her to leave. Only the old man can. He's already got a replacement lined up too. Firenze will be here about… now."

Just as he said it, the doors opened, and the centaur Firenze entered, the new Divination teacher, with Dumbledore standing beside him. Dumbledore moved forward, smiling at McGonagall as she escorted Trelawney back into the castle, before turning a disdainful smirk towards Umbridge.  
"This is Firenze, our new Divination teacher. I'm sure you will find him satisfactory."


	9. Dumbledore's Army

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry, Ron and Hermione sat in the Defence against the Dark Arts classroom, talking to Dante.  
Hermione was very angry. "That foul woman is trying to take this school apart. We need to make sure the students learn to defend themselves. We all need to be able to. Dante, we need you to give us additional lessons, so that we learn."

Dante stood in the middle of the Chamber of Secrets, surrounded by students.  
"Ok. Where we are now, no one can disturb us. You kids ready for the real thing?"  
Dante picked up a bell he had, shaking it. A portal then appeared behind him, and thousands of white skinned, skeletal demons appeared from it.

Dante stood with the students, who also prepared to fight the demons.  
"Now, let's rock!"

Dante and the students fought the demons, the students properly doing so for the first time. Using all the knowledge they now had of demons from the weeks of studying that had led up to this, the students were ready.

A few days later, the students returned, to find Dante's next opponent for them was a cluster of different kinds of demons, ranging from ghost-like creatures wearing billowy black robes and carrying scythes to large lizards and spiders to reptilian creatures made from ice. Dante had captured many different kinds of demon so as to force the students to adapt. The students still proved capable, and were quick learners.

The ice demons were weak to Reducto, but their ice could not be melted by any of the student's fire spells. Hermione had explained that the ice was so cold that nothing short of hellfire would melt it. The creatures in the billowy robes were intangible, and therefore completely immune to most damage. It turned out, however, that somehow Expecto Patronum could force them into their physical form, which was weak and vulnerable. Each of the demons had a weakness, and Dante taught the students how to exploit every single one of them.

They were now learning how to defeat low class demons, a task that would seem impossible to most fully grown wizards.

Several more lessons came, and the students slowly mastered the art of fighting low class demons, though Dante refused to allow them to fight higher level demons.

Dante and Harry had started discussing names for their activity, as Harry had a strong suspicion a war would be starting with Voldemort, and a name would help rally people. Dante had shown disinterest, simply titling the activity the Bloody Palace, but Harry had decided to name not just the activity, but the group. The name, as he, Ron and Hermione worked out between them, was to be Dumbledore's Army.


	10. Umbridge, The Minor Obstacle

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Standing out the front of the OWL exams, having just finished his exams, Harry felt his knees give out as his head was filled with a horrific vision. The vision of Sirius Black, his godfather, helpless on his knees before Voldemort. More images flashed through Harry's mind of where they were, and he finally recognised it as being the Department of Mysteries at the Ministry of Magic.

He came to to see Hermione kneeling in front of him, a concerned look on her face.  
"Sirius." He said.  
Harry, Ron and Hermione ran through the halls, looking for a fireplace where they could use the Floo network to reach the Ministry. With people everywhere, they weren't having any luck. Suddenly, they ran into Dante, to whom they explained what was happening.  
Dante nodded. "Ok. We'll use my fireplace."

The four of them ran to Dante's office, firing up the Floo network in his fireplace.  
"Alert the Order. I'm going alone." Said Harry.  
"Don't be stupid, kid. We're going with you." Said Dante.

"Oh, you're not going anywhere."  
The four of them turned to see Umbridge, who held Ginny by the neck and had her wand pointed at her. Neville and Luna stood beside her, having obviously tried to defend Ginny. Umbridge then tossed Ginny aside and pointed her wand at Dante, who was moving forward, and who she judged as being her deadliest enemy present.

Umbridge stood as tall as she could, trying to seem powerful, while pointing her wand at Dante, occasionally turning it towards Harry and the others. Seeing that Dante was still approaching, Umbridge grew angrier.  
"I am in charge here!" She snarled, attempting to use the Cruciatus curse on him, but instead causing the trick wand she was holding to explode in her hand. Dante then slammed his foot into her ribcage, launching her straight through the stone wall of Dante's office, from which she flew through the air briefly before falling into the ravine below.

Dante then leaned out the hole in the broken wall, and called out to her, "You may be in charge up here, but you're in traction down there!"


	11. Battle At The Ministry

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville, Luna, Ginny and Dante stepped out of the fireplace at the Ministry, heading to the door of the Department of Mysteries. They entered a large room full of glowing blue orbs on shelves, where Harry searched for the row where he would find Sirius. Finally, he found the row, and the place he had seen in the vision, but Sirius was not there.  
"He should be here."

Neville called Harry over to an orb that had his name on it. Harry picked it up, looking into the surface. Suddenly, Hermione called out to him, and he turned to see a man approaching, who wore dark robes and a black metal mask.  
"Where's Sirius?" Demanded Harry.  
The unmistakable voice of Lucius Malfoy answered, "You should learn to tell the difference between dreams and reality. You only saw what the dark lord wanted you to see."  
Lucius then removed his mask, smirking at them.

Lucius then held out his hand. "Now give me that prophecy."  
Harry realised that Lucius was here to retrieve the prophecy, not to kill him.  
"You do anything to us, and I'll break it."  
An insane laugh echoed from behind Lucius, filling the room.  
"He knows how to play! Itty bitty baby Potter!"  
A dark haired woman wearing a most immodest corset walked up beside Lucius, a crooked wand in her hand.

"Bellatrix Lestrange?" Cried Neville, moving forward.  
"Neville Longbottom, is it? How's mum and dad?" Answered Bellatrix, looking sadistic.  
Neville ground his teeth. "Better now they're about to be avenged." He began to raise his wand, but Harry stopped him, gripping his arm.

Lucius moved forward. "All we want is that prophecy. Just give it to me, and we won't hurt you."  
A deep voice suddenly said, "You speak as if you were the strongest one in the room."  
In a flash, Dante appeared beside Lucius and Bellatrix, punching both of them with adequate force to send them both flying across the room, so far that Harry lost sight of them.

Harry and the others then ran out of the prophecy chamber, easily fighting off the other Death Eaters that tried to stop them. They ran through the entire Department, before finally reaching a room with a large empty archway in it. Bellatrix and Lucius appeared close behind them, still accompanied by several Death Eaters.

Just as the Death Eaters were about to attack, there was a flash of light, and Sirius Black stood beside Harry.  
"You people keep your fucking hands off my godson."  
In the next few seconds, there were more flashes of light, and the other members of the Order appeared, along with Dumbledore. The Death Eaters began attacking, but the Order, the students and the Devil Hunter were more than a match for them. Lucius was rapidly overwhelmed by Dumbledore, but Bellatrix overwhelmed Kingsley Shacklebolt, Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks, and then turned her attention to Sirius.

Bellatrix started to force Sirius back. Harry was fighting two Death Eaters at once, and couldn't intervene. Dumbledore was fighting a large group of them, while Madeye fought the rest. Just as Sirius started to stumble and waver, someone blocked the stunning curse that would have otherwise sent Sirius Black through the veil. Sirius turned to see Dante standing beside him.

Dante shoved Sirius to one side, preparing to fight Bellatrix himself. Bellatrix fired a killing curse at Dante, but Dante struck it with the sword, obliterating it. Bellatrix fired multiple killing curses, before apparating behind Dante and firing more. Despite her efforts, Bellatrix was unable to hit Dante or even come close. Finally deciding to end it, Dante dodged a killing curse that was sent his way, before flinging his sword point first into Bellatrix's chest.

Bellatrix stood, impaled. Somehow, the crazy woman was still alive, despite the massive hole in her chest. She glared at Dante. "How can you do this? You could serve the dark lord, and use that power properly, and keep the weak where they belong! I still wanted to kill all those filthy traitors and mud-bloods!"

Dante shook his head in distaste at Bellatrix's sadistic attitude, then smirked. He then gestured towards himself, yelling "Come on!"  
His sword then flew back into his hand, with Bellatrix still hanging from the end of it. He then caused red energy to arc across the blade, and released it in a shockwave of some sort, launching Bellatrix backwards into the stone wall, watching as she literally shattered on impact.  
"And that's how ya do it."

Every other Death Eater had been subdued, and the Order had suffered no casualties, only minor injuries inflicted mostly by Bellatrix. Everyone jumped when there was a burst of shadow, and the dark lord, Lord Voldemort himself stood before them.

Voldemort raised his wand to attack Harry, but Dumbledore stood in the way, ready to defend. Just as Dumbledore and Voldemort were about to attack each other, Dante stepped in front of Dumbledore, looking smug.  
"Not bad, people, but you should leave this ugly bastard to the demon."

Voldemort glared at Dante, unable to believe that this man who looked to be a mere muggle was so arrogant as to openly insult him.  
"I am Lord Voldemort. The greatest sorcerer in the world. You are a fool to challenge me."  
Dante smirked. "So, you gonna fight or what?"


	12. Dante vs Voldemort

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Voldemort pointed his wand at Dante as Dante ran forward, firing a killing curse into Dante's chest. Dante stopped in his tracks and fell onto the floor. Voldemort laughed.  
"Fool. Filthy muggles."  
As Voldemort started to point his wand at Harry, there was a gunshot, and Voldemort's shoulder started bleeding. He then watched in horror as Dante stood up, smirking.  
"Is that it?"

Voldemort fired multiple destructive curses at Dante, which Dante blocked easily, not even bothering to dodge.  
"You really don't have anything. Most of the kids I taught at Skin Condition High could do better than that."

Screaming in rage and disbelief, Voldemort fired more magic attacks, which were effortlessly blocked as Dante charged forward, not even breaking stride to block them. When Dante had almost reached Voldemort, the dark wizard fired a curse designed for massive physical damage. The curse collided with Dante's incoming sword, and an explosion resulted.

In the wake of the explosion stood Voldemort, looking around for his missing enemy. Dante's sword was spinning in the air several metres above Voldemort, but Dante himself was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, Voldemort felt a gun pressed into the side of his head, and turned to find himself staring down the barrel of Dante's gun.

Dante smirked, charging demonic power through the gun and pulling the trigger. Voldemort gasped, feeling his Horcruxes die in rapid succession. In the Room of Requirement at Hogwarts, Rowena Ravenclaw's diadem burst. Thousands of miles away, Nagini the snake died with a pained scream. In Bellatrix Lestrange's vault at Gringotts, Helga Hufflepuff's cup exploded. At Grimmauld Place, Salazar Slytherin's locket, which Regulus Black had stolen from Voldemort's hiding place for it at the Horcrux Cave, burst into a million pieces, and in the Gaunt Shack in Little Hangleton, Marvolo Gaunt's ring exploded, the band completely destroyed, leaving only the damaged black stone, the symbol of the Deathly Hallows still clearly visible on the cracked stone surface.

At the Ministry, right behind Dante, Harry started to buckle, gasping in sudden pain. The instant Dante sensed what was happening, he gripped his sword with his mind, and flung the sword through Harry, the massive demonic blade passing harmlessly through him and taking out a monstrosity that looked like a smaller version of Voldemort, sticking straight into the stone wall with this disgusting creature impaled on the end of the blade. Harry collapsed, but was caught by Dumbledore, while Sirius, Ron, Hermione, and all the others gathered around, turning to watch as Voldemort gave one final scream, and exploded.


	13. Sealed Friendship

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Dante stood out the front of the school. The rest of the year had been fairly uneventful. The idiotic Minister of Magic had been forced to admit that Voldemort was back and that Sirius Black was innocent, as Dante had been so brazenly rude as to walk into Cornelius Fudge's office at the Ministry carrying the struggling Wormtail and then unceremoniously toss him across Fudge's desk. Wormtail had then unwillingly admitted the truth of everything.

Dante had waved with a mock smile at the badly damaged Umbridge as Madame Pomfrey had healed her in the hospital wing. Umbridge had suffered no permanent injuries, but she was not quite so arrogant, having essentially become road kill. Harry had been in hospital for several weeks, recovering from the pain of what they now knew was part of his soul being torn out. Hermione, Ron, Dumbledore, Dante and Sirius had spent a great deal of time by his side during his recovery. He had almost always had at least one of them there.

Dante had apologised for hurting Harry, as he partially blamed himself, as it had been him killing Voldemort that had harmed Harry so much. Dante had given Harry a gold necklace with a large red stone in it, and shown that he himself wore a similar one, only with a silver chain. He had explained that the necklace he had given Harry had belonged to his brother, who had received it from their mother. He had told Harry to hold onto it.

As Dante took one final look at the school he had dubbed Skin Condition High, his demonic instincts sensed that Harry was nearby.  
"What's up, kid?"

Harry stepped out of the school, moving over to Dante.  
"You're leaving?"  
Dante nodded. "Yeah. My contract expired. Job done. I was brought in to keep the pink toad out of the job. I've done it. The job's finished."  
Harry smiled sadly. "Thank you, Dante. You saved my life, you saved Sirius, and who knows who else?"  
Dante shrugged. "No need to thank me, kid. Anyone who acts like a douchebag as much as that guy needs to be taught a lesson."

Dante started to say something else, but then he just silently half smiled.  
"Take care of yourself, kid." Dante patted Harry on the shoulder and walked past.  
"Wait." Called Harry. "You forgot this."  
Dante turned to see that Harry was holding up Vergil's pendant.  
"Keep it."  
"What?" Cried Harry, surprised. "I thought this meant a lot to you."  
"That's the only kind of gift worth giving. I want to entrust it to you, so I am. What you do from here is your call."

Dante turned and began to leave. Harry put the pendant back around his neck.  
"Dante, will we ever meet again?"  
Without turning around, Dante gave a simple half salute over his shoulder, before suddenly speeding up, vanishing in an instant.

Back at the Devil May Cry, Dante sat, enjoying his pizza. Patty had kept the place clean for him, and he suspected she would be very angry at him for leaving for as long as he had, but he was still looking forward to seeing her. The phone rang, and Dante kicked the table, causing the phone to spin into the air, landing smoothly in his hand.

"Devil May Cry. Oh hey, it's you. What's up, old man?"  
Dumbledore spoke at the other end, and Dante leaned back in his chair.

"You want me to go back and teach for another year? I almost destroyed the place in one year, and you want to give me a second shot? Okay, but you need a backup teacher so I can come back here on occasion to continue my business. Yeah, I guess Snape would do. What's that? Oh yeah, I got the money. I've already used it to pay for ripping up that bridge last year, and for blowing up the roof of that hotel and ripping down all those office buildings, which were empty at the time, by the way. I'm ready to pay Lady for smashing her motorcycle on a demon's face, too. And the pizza boy was very shocked when I actually paid him instead of kicking him out. It was quite funny, actually."


	14. Epilogue

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter or Devil May Cry.**

Dante stood in his office, listening to a group of students who stood outside in his classroom, each in some form of fancy outfit. Dante had decided that it might be fun for both him and the students to throw a party every now and again, but he had expected more action.

He had mentioned it to several students, including Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville, Ginny and Luna, among others. He had told them that they could bring a date if they chose, and had told them not to get him in trouble, using the words, "If you drink booze, do your best to make sure I don't know about it."

Dante had later overheard Ron and Hermione arguing about taking Cormac Maclagan to the party. Dante had rolled his eyes, as he had known about the interest between Ron and Hermione ever since he had known them. He also knew Harry liked Ginny, but he decided to take one pain in the rear at a time.

Dante walked out of his office and into the classroom, looking at the assorted students. Dean Thomas stood with Ginny, and Dante could tell they were fighting by the somewhat aggressive stance on each of them. Ron and Hermione stood with Harry in between them, looking uncomfortable.

Dante stepped up to Harry.  
"Your friends are lookin' kinda constipated, kid. I'm about to start some music, and that'll tell everyone to dance. You're gonna push these two together, and I'm gonna handle Slimy over there…" Dante gestured to Maclagan, who stood off to the side with a predatory smirk on his face as he regarded Hermione. "And Droolsalot over there." He gestured to Lavender Brown, who stood in another corner, a bright, interested smile on her face as she regarded Ron.

Before Harry could respond, Dante had vanished, and already stood by his jukebox, which he had brought specifically for this. Dante revved up a heavy metal song titled "Devil's Cry", and then vanished again. Harry gripped Hermione's arm, telling her what she should do. As Maclagan started to strut towards Hermione, there was a flash of movement, and Maclagan found himself standing at the window with Dante, being told how good a job he had done on his test. As Lavender started to approach the uncomfortable Ron and Hermione, Dante dashed over to her, pulling her to the side also, standing her next to Maclagan.  
"Alright. You guys are in luck. I've got a special award I'm gonna give each of you two for your performance in the last test."

While Dante delayed Maclagan and Lavender, Harry and Hermione pulled Ron to the centre of the office, which served as the dance floor. Harry then separated and left his friends together. Harry then looked at Ginny, seeing Dean and her exchange an uncomfortable look. Harry knew that to approach would be inappropriate and unfair to both of them.

Harry then turned just in time to see Hermione get bumped face first into Ron's face, where the two of them were then forced to see each other very up close. After a few seconds, the two were wrapped in each other's arms, sharing their first moment as a couple.

Harry stood in the empty Gryffindor common room. Several weeks had passed since Dante's party. Ron and Hermione were still together, but the party had been broken up by an angry McGonagall, who had come to complain about the noise. Dante had laughed at her, but unlike Umbridge, McGonagall was a smart lady, and knew Dante actually had respect for her, and therefore that as the deputy headmistress, she had more than enough power to tell him to quiet down.

As Harry started to drift off to sleep, he heard someone nearby, and turned to see Ginny, who sat down next to him. "How are you feeling, Harry?"  
Harry shrugged. "So-so."  
They turned to see Ron leave the common room with Hermione, too engrossed in kissing her to notice his best friend sitting with his sister. Hermione, for her part, noticed, and smiled her approval at Harry.  
"About time, don't you think?" Said Ginny, obviously referring to Ron and Hermione's relationship.  
Harry chuckled, remembering all the uncomfortable moments between the two friends.

Ginny suddenly leaned across Harry, looking him in the eye.  
"How do you feel watching them, Harry?"  
Harry shrugged. "Happy for them, I guess."

In his devil form, Dante hovered outside the window of Gryffindor Tower, his enhanced hearing picking up every word.  
"What the hell? Dude, she likes you, and she knows you like her. Why don't you just move in already? These people are such prudes."  
Dante watched as Ginny started to stand, and he knew he had to intervene. Using his telekinesis to control his sword, which he had deliberately put in the Gryffindor common room the day before, Dante made his sword fly into a chair, which was sent across the room, where it gently bumped Ginny's leg, causing her to stumble slightly. Acting on instinct, Harry caught her, which inadvertently put his face close to hers. Taking advantage of this moment, Ginny pulled Harry to her and kissed him.

Just as Ginny was about to become fully engrossed, she looked out the window to see a huge red and black devil floating outside. Harry and Ginny separated to face the red devil, and they swore they saw it noticeably shake its head in annoyance. As the two students drew their wands, the devil vanished from the window.

The next day, Dante slipped into the Gryffindor common room and reclaimed his sword, ignoring the looks he received from the students who saw him.

Dante then taught a theory class to Harry's class that day, teaching them about which enemies are best to retreat from. He taught them that size is usually, but not always an indicator, and essentially told them that if a demon is humanoid and seems to change shape, it is best avoided.

To this, Hermione brought out some of her notes, and asked him about the devil lords, which she knew were the demon equivalent of royalty. Dante had betrayed a certain amount of emotion when the name Mundus was mentioned, but other than that, he seemed to be disinterested.  
"The demons you just named are definitely to be avoided. Seeing as how you brought it up, I feel I can explain this to you. Mundus is the most powerful of all, and he has enough power to make this castle turn itself inside out with his thoughts. Abigail is dead, as of last year, but I'm pretty sure Argosax is still alive."

Hermione narrowed her eyes. "You say Abigail is dead, but the book doesn't mention that. It talks of Mundus' defeat at the hands of Sparda and Sparda's son, but what about Abigail? How do you know he's dead?"  
Dante shuffled uncomfortably. He knew Hermione knew who he was, and therefore she knew exactly what the answer would be. Dante finally shrugged, deciding it couldn't be helped.  
"He's dead because I killed him. He was tearing up the entire world, so I killed him."

Dante finished the class and went to his office, before turning to see that Harry had followed him there. "What's up, kid?"  
"I know it was you, Dante. Outside the window last night. Hermione did some research, and she knows your background. You're the son of Sparda."  
Dante sat down, pouring himself a glass of Jack Daniels whiskey. Harry went on.  
"The book contained a picture of Sparda's true form, and it looked like a bigger version of the devil outside our window last night. I assumed you were just watching until I checked the common room and found your sword just resting in a cupboard. You sent that chair into Ginny's leg, didn't you?"

Dante rolled his eyes, instantly swallowing the whiskey.  
"Well, I had to do something. She was hitting on you, and you weren't noticing. If I hadn't done that you'd still be a bat boy. Thanks to me, you now know what first base feels like."  
Harry felt himself blush, still not entirely used to Dante's rude personality.

Later that afternoon, Dante was called into Dumbledore's office. The headmaster sat in his large headmaster's seat, while Dante slumped down in a chair across from Dumbledore.  
"Dante, I hear from Professor McGonagall that you had a teenage style party in your classroom after hours, and I also heard you essentially forced Miss Granger and Mr Weasley together. Rather strange behaviour for a teacher, don't you think?"  
Dante put his feet up on Dumbledore's desk. "Oh, come on. You mean to say you don't get annoyed watching two kids like each other and not do anything about it? If I hadn't done that, he'd be dating that Lavender chick and getting bored out of his skull, and she'd be getting chased everywhere by that sleazy Cormac dude. You can't say I didn't do them a favour. Only problem is, I told Maclagan and Lavender I had a special award for them, without thinking of any such award first. Now I gotta think up an award for them before tomorrow, and I don't think a lifetime supply of pizza will do it."

Dumbledore smirked. "I also know that you put your sword in Gryffindor's common room, and assumed your devil form outside its window. Are you trying to scare sleeping students or was there a benevolent purpose behind that, too?"  
Dante smirked. "Maybe a bit of both."  
Dumbledore leaned back, drinking more of his drink.  
"I see no reason for punishment or trouble. You did no damage. You are in no strife, and if you wish to throw another party, ask my permission, and understand that we do have better rooms for it than a classroom where demons are killed. Also, Dante, no more scaring the life out of my students by assuming your devil form."


End file.
